I was talking to my sister-in-law and great friend Jamie and we both decided that next year we would like to hibernate during the month of January. That would be nice if it were possible, but a little extreme, especially being a wife and mother. I would have to put the rest of my family into hibernation to make it happen.
Instead, after thinking about it, I’m going to write a few of the amazing things I have been able to do this month with my family that I would not have been able to do if I had hibernated.
Earlier this week I was able to make the most delicious dinner of creamed eggs over toast, or bread in this case because it was fresh out of the oven. I had Tommy and Taivan helping me peel the eggs to put into the white sauce because they were hungry and whining at me for food and this was a good distraction that sped up dinner and kept me sane as well. I was trying to stir the sauce and help them rinse the shells off the peeled eggs at the same. I kept thinking that I must have sloshed some of the sauce onto the unit because something smelled a little burnt. After all the boiled eggs had been added to the sauce and I was tasting the sauce for salt and pepper, I realized I did not stir the sauce enough and it had scorched. I was devastated until Tommy tasted it and announced that it tasted better than usual because it tasted smoked like bacon. I went with that positive statement and realized that instead of focusing on how it was not the way I thought it should be, I could focus on the new flavor. Embrace the mistake and savor the time I was able to spend with my happy boys.
I have also been able to relish the time I have with my sweet baby girl. Once last week it was extremely difficult to wake up at 3:00 in the morning to feed Carly. I remember holding her and realizing how long I had waited and prayed and fasted for her arrival. And now she was here, snuggled in my arms and so perfect. I spent an extra fifteen minutes holding her because I could after that. I sat in the quiet stillness and listened the precious noises she still makes at four months.
I decided at the turn of the year to begin being more deliberate about putting Lucy, Tommy and Taivan to bed instead of shoving them toward their beds, wishing they would just go to sleep. I knew if I made bedtime more rewarding for all of us, it would change the way I thought about it. So I have been trying to read them each a chapter out of a book and take the time to intentionally tuck them into bed. This has helped encourage conversation and bonding that I never anticipated. I am so grateful that I started doing this, and plan to continue it through the rest of the year.
I have been trying to open up more conversation with Matthew and Jenny and have been studying how to use open-ended questions to encourage this when they come home from school. It doesn’t always work, but today I am grateful for the peaceful time that having two dogs affords me. I am going to try more in the future to use the time it takes to walk the dogs to talk to my kids. I went on a walk with Matthew and I loved to hear him telling me about stuff that otherwise would’t have come out, nothing earth-shattering, but I got to see into his soul a little further and understand him.
Jenny has become my stand-by babysitter. She knows Carly’s cues and is very good at caring for her little sister. It has specifically helpful as Tom and I go to the temple or just out on a date. She is learning that babies are cuter than birds, especially when they are family.
I am happy that January is almost over and that warmer weather is around the corner, but I am also happy that I have this time to get to know myself and my children and try to improve each day and week a little more. Warm weather does seem so refreshing after the cold winter.